Me and my World

undecided

2009-06-22T12:41:00.001+08:00

what the hell am i doing in this life???

Holiday

2009-06-16T23:09:00.004+08:00

well. at least i m back in singapore now.
cameron is a bore since my sis are all no fun.
seriously, who cares whether your feet will have wrinkle when you are at the waterfall?
sheesh. totally fun spoiler. hahax.

oh well. missed syg throughout the whole trip.
wished i had actually talk to my dad about asking him along.
at least i know i wont be bored to death at cameron.

cameron is a nice place to walk around at.
the temperature is like 18degress on normal warm days.
12degress when raining.
yep. i was freezing there. a girl who is so used to fan for all her life is now trying to adapt to the cold weather. ha. well. i survived. except for the cold and all. hehex.

first day.
see all biggest plants shop available in cameron.

seriously. there is nothing much to see here except for the plantation.

second day. totally not in the mood. for the first time i wished i had the money so that i can fly back to singapore.
visit rose farm.
visit cactus farm.
visit miniature of waterfall (cameron district).
visit strawberry park (strawberry plucking)
visit tea plantation.

third day.
visit the lake house.
visit waterfall (perak district)

knows what kill the whole traveling? the turnings on the road to town.
gosh. there is sure lots of turning. if you think the turning to genting is bad, wait til you come to this place. half of us puke, not able to tolerate the turnings and all.

7 hours drive. one relax point before hectic start all over again. lots of fresh air. fresh food

i guess i will just give it a 6.5 out of 10.
go here if you love plants. =)

to darling nures - HAPPY BIRTHDAY! sorry for not being able to be there to celebrate your birthday with you. love ya lots.

.aishah.

forever and always

2009-06-07T21:47:00.005+08:00

"I love you more than any word can say ... I love you more than every action I take ... I'll be right here loving you till the end."

we all know who i love. but nevertheless.. i still feel like telling everyone again and again that i love shafiq chua. my one and only..

.aishah.

2009-06-04T23:28:00.001+08:00

lets just say.. ignore all my previous post coz i m definitely going to turn over a new leaf. just give me a break and time of my own.

||.aishah.||

2009-04-26T00:30:00.002+08:00

SYG

HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!

aishah

2009-04-26T00:13:00.002+08:00

you blame us. yet again.
its always the same old thing. we pointed out some mistake we did and what they did, and you start blaming us again.

oh yea. you have done LOTS OF THINGS!
i told you i m not questioning whether you have done your thing as a president. but when i did, did you even take well?

nope. obviously not.

you ended up claiming that we are at the wrong. that is precisely what i want to admit. we were in the wrong. don't let this bunch of people repeat what we have done. why can't you just get it. see it in my view. we kept spoon-feeding them, they depend on us. so who will they depend on once we leave this school? i for sure not going to hang around in school just to help them. hey, i love school. but not because of them. its because of us.

we werent good, i have to say. frankly, our senior were much better. they know what to do. they follow through their decision. but they never run away from the mistake they have created. you have done that. you have proven to me bright and clear you were incapable.

when you were selected as a president, i was all up to help you. to guide you. to the extend i do the stuff for you. i look up to you as a president. but have you ever think of us in your team?

NOPE. you were thinking of how to handle the juniors. yes they are the future of the club. but are they the type who will take up this responsibilities? just see the disaster they created for us to clear up.

it was wrong of us - take that back- it was wrong of ME to keep comparing them to us. if we don't compare, how do we know where they stand.

they know what they were suppose to do. the guidance should be coming from you now since you want to continue with the whole fucking thing. our time has come to an end. its their time to shine(or not).

why cant you just see what we have went through. i m not stopping you to continue of what you want to be. i m not questioning your capabilities except for that very evening. but now i want to ask you - ARE YOU REALLY PREPARED FOR THESE WHOLE THING?

we are against your very idea, why, because we work with them, we know what they were like. again i said. they are not stupid. they are not dumb. they not what to do. but do they want to do it?

you have not work with them as a committee. so you wouldnt know. wait. of course you wouldnt know. they acted hardworking in front of you. which is why i m done with this whole thing.

farhan can scold me after you complaint to him. who cares? i dont.

i have done enough mistakes and goods for the club. i want to see what our juniors will do for us. i don't want them dependent on us.

you said you are afraid the foc incident will occur again. then i ask you, why don't they seem at all guilty about it when they saw us?

go create a new change to the club. the 3 of us are definitely out of this. we had ENOUGH OF THIS!

i wish you all the best. fret not. they destroy our ADD, i will destroy THE WHOLE CLUB!

aishah

2009-04-12T23:01:00.005+08:00

i miss the moment we were together.
the moment where everywhere was dark and still and you hug me to sleep.
the moment where you comfort me so that i will sleep peacefully.
the moment where i know you loves me.

i know for some time you love me.
how much of it is the question i would always asked you.
now i know how much.
now i know to what extend.

its unbelievable that we have came this far
after all those crying.
those arguments.
those fights.
but we did it.
a year pass and we are still as strong as ever.

i wonder whether you recalled the first time you said i love you.
the first time you called.
the first time you touched me.
the first time you kissed me.
the first time you made me tingle.

i think you do.
i wish i could have another first time.
its a wonderful moment to spend my first time with you.
i want all those moment to last forever.

i love you so much.
pardon if i ever make you angry.
upset.
cry.
all i ever wish was to see you smile within and externally.
i want to be there for you when you need me.
every single time.
just like you did everytime when i was in need.
you were there next to me in the nick of time whenever i need a shoulder to lean on.
whenever i need a hug.
you were always there.
and i want to do that for you too.

the 3 words 'i love you'
is never enough to express what i feel for you.
at least do know.
i really do love you.
and i will do whatever it takes to make you happy.

happy one year anniversary syg.
.aishah.
ilyilyilyilyilyilyilyilyilyilyilyilyilyily

2009-04-11T13:50:00.002+08:00

i know i know.
has been centuries since i last updated my blog.. oh well. what to do.. i just have no more mood to do so since things are coming and attacking me at a fast pace..

ADD down. Camp down.
all i m left with is Lollipop@zouk. maybe i should like promote here. ok. those who will like to come for the back-to-school party, also known as zouk, tell me ay? tickets selling at $10. its quite worth it actually that you pay for the party at $10. i mean, when do you ever get to club at $10 only?

darn. its been quite tiring time actually. wanted to find part time job. i did not even when looking for it ah.

anyway. i went to both BE and DMIT camp. there really is quite distinct similarity in both camp. both OC depend on their senior to clean their fuck up mess up. not organized is another thing. i really don't know what will happen if all the seniors leave. will they survive? hmm.

oh well.. i m not in the position to say anything. i myself never teach the juniors what they are suppose to do.

but can you blame me for that actually? none of my seniors actually help me or even guide me ah. they left the stuff there waiting for me to clear it or to let it rot. oh well. i guess we spoon fed the juniors so much they expect we can help them.

bull shit..

hahax.

well. i have no mood to update my blog actually. kinda busy currently. the only reason i update is because some of my friends have been complaining. hehex.

pardon pardon.

don't want anymore miscommunication through blogging.

oh well.

it will be a year anniversary in like 15 more days.. hehe.
love you lots..

.aishah.

2009-03-15T23:02:00.003+08:00

it come to a point where i want to throw everything aside.
i cant be bothered already..
why should i not do so when nobody cares.

thanks for everything.
but i had enough.
its time for me to move on.

backfromholiday
.aishah.

2009-03-13T08:31:00.003+08:00

at time like this, i feel guilty on taking side. one thing that make me uncomfortable is that i know that you have been talking about me behind my back. if you really call yourself a friend, you will definitely try to forget the past and move on. repeat only when all of us are reminiscing the past. why is it so difficult to forgive and forget? whats more, the people involved are actually the people not in it. i m actually in better term to the person whom i used to have issued with in the past, rather than the rest.

Forgive and Forget is a difficult term, i know. but once you learn the skill to it, you realize that it is easier to move on without thinking about the past. you get to communicate easily and all. i have been trying to do so. but have you?

misunderstanding usually occurs 'cause the uninvolved party tend to side one party to another. too many people involved that the matters get out of hand. yeah, that person involved can tell you everything what he think about and such. but don't side with him/her. be neutral. from what i see, you are not.

i know i have no right to be saying this. but it really pain to see one struggling to be alive since he feels alone, while the other feel like a winner thanks to the support of the others. i myself feel at lost as to how to console the other. the only thing i can do is to tell him, "he just need time. Let him cool. After sometime he will realize what happen." i myself have no solution to this, as i m feeling the same way as he does, except that mine have been going on for quite some time.

it is really unfair when you said i spend more with my other friends than you all. yeap. i m busy. i tried my very best to spend more time. but uncomfortability is what i felt everytime i m with you guys. you may ask why is this so. i tell you why. try being in my shoe, of knowing that you have been talking about me, but i m left in the dark on what you talk about. see if you like it.

i m not blaming anyone for this issue. but for those not really involve in this, give them some time! don't start pinpointing mistake at one another. it will come to a no good.

misunderstanding occurs since there is a lack of clarity during the transmission of communication. just to remind you of that.

for this post, don't start assuming. if you think you know, then you know. if you dont, then you dont. don't say i m not warning you.

listen to both thoughts if you want to help them. dont just listen to one party and start assuming again. that is called unfairness.

oh well. i don't know what the hell i m talking about. i hope you are feeling better after the talk to that certain person.

ooh. and to all OPSS alumni, GO FOR SPEECH DAY!! we need the money in order to cut down the ticket price for the alumni dinner which will be held in July.

hehe. HOLIDAY HERE I COME! in need of serious break, man!

love you syg for being there.

p.s: PHOEBE!!! i feel bad for not being able to celebrate your birthday on the day itself. i promise we go out together. HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

.aishah.

2009-03-12T23:33:00.009+08:00

Early Birthday Present by Val and Zhi Li
thanks you guys!!

A day with SYG!!
at Vivo City

Eve of HSBC Women's Champion (Briefing)

Frosted Chocolate Malt

The Last Day of duty

The Event Venue : Interactive village - Tanah Merah Country Club

2009-03-08T21:57:00.003+08:00

down it goes all the papers, add and hsbc women champion. frankly, i never felt so relieve before. i mean, seriously, since the beginning of the year i was preoccupied with one thing or another. if its not club, it will be my school work. now that i have stop all club duties, and exam are finally over, i can have all the time to myself.

NOT!

seriously. who can have their break with a 6 weeks holiday, filled with events after events? and i still need to work. like seriously earn bucks. shucks. lots to pay. and seriously lots. so anyone with any job intro?

ADD was horrible. well, true, the event was enjoyable to the people. but lets admit it. it wasnt the add committee that make it good. it was thanks to the entertainment company and MMBE for all their hard work. it is so unfair that we got the name. i don't think we deserve it actually.

i mean, let see. i got missing committee. 2 committee sacks. 4 thinks FOC is much more important than ADD. i understand the cruciality of it all to get it done. but fuck man. ADD is a few days more. which should be your main priority. already i have cut down the amount of work for you so that you can concentrate on FOC. but to ask to leave early because of FOC, a day before ADD really hurts me.

all the lecturers and year 3 will say that we have done successfully. but i think that is the most bullshitting thing i ever heard. did any of them knew i was out there worrying and crying? did they even like help me during the event? urm. like NO. i have to tell them exactly what to do, with all the details and such. and there you are complaining, doing the least. telling me what the fuck to do.scolding me in front of the others ticket holders. FUCK. who you think you are?

DO MY FUCKING WORK IF YOU THINK YOU ARE THAT GOOD!

i would have just sack majority of year 1 in my committee if i had at least 5 more months to work with. still remembered the first time we started out. everyone was eager. slowly one by one die out.

why in the world am i recalling back what happen??

well. i m so definitely disappointed in myself and in the committee. i thank those who were there to support me, boosting my morale and telling me words of encouragement.( Ama, shiffa, val, zhi li, syg, gideon, skye)

then again, i should have stayed optimistic. my bad. my bad

its surprising what one mouth can do to just disrupt your whole reputation. now i m the bad guy, while you are the good guy. thanks.

hsbc women champion has burnt me crisp. yeap. i m damn red and roasted. a slight heat from you will cause me to yelp like as if i was being caned.

well, met a few new people there. and they are damn friendly lah! like the mascot guy. i wished i had tried pushing him down the pool and rolling him around. or the security guy who kept saying i was talking too much and i grown blacker each day. hahax.

it was nice experience working with new people. but there are things that some just cant meet eyes to eyes. compromising is always needed when a collaboration is happening. in time like this, you experience how others work so that you know just how to handle when you meet this people in the future. its with this we know how we can improve the way we handle work.

am i even making sense?

oh screw it.

lots of pictures coming up.. now to my beloved bed. heh.

.aishah.

2009-02-17T23:27:00.004+08:00

click on the picture to read more about me.

Personality test

seriously.. try this.. darn accurate..
mine is like totally true except for the paperwork part. hahax. tell me your personality, once you have taken the test. =)

.aishah.

2009-02-13T23:04:00.004+08:00

Its time like this when you realise who really cared and loved you. Frankly, I thought back of those time i had fun with them and i seriously missed them. I guess fun can never come in between with work.

I hate the very thought that someone bluntly asked me whether I was doing my work. Sorry miss or mister. If it seems that i have not been doing my work, then I m really sorry. If you think I m torturing my committee into doing more work, then continue thinking that way, 'cause I m still going to treat them that way. Fuck.

Couldnt control my temper when I received the FUCKING sms. whoever you are - if you think i sux at my job, take over me then. I m more than freaking willing to pass you the job. if its not for Noori and Syg, I will think I m still bursting with temper now. thanks alot you both.

sorry for the vulgar though.

but seriously. anyone will be pissed with this message.
'So 4 tables only? Are u doin ur job?'
totally copied of my text message to here. screw you man.

frankly I don't mind if he just ask me other question. like maybe, 'how come others said you are not doing your job?' or maybe 'heard you have problems with the events. want to talk about it' but NOOOOOO.

gosh.. the 'Are u doing ur job?' is still in my freaking head.

I know its your big event. think I didn't know? its not as if I dump it half way which I almost did it. I will work my very best to get the people to attend. do you think its that easy?

fucking stupid if you ask me.

are you like really a year 3?

screw everyone who complain so much. go out to the real world. see if you can complaint that much. its just the bare minimum and there you are complaining. I m not that dumb, not knowing what the fuck you are talking to the top management, you know.

ah..

no use complaining here I realise.

cheer up aishah. valentine's day tomorrow. be happy!!!
screw them all.

who ever say friday the 13th is not unlucky and people are just being superstitious?

.aishah

2009-02-09T23:40:00.004+08:00

the exam period is here again. oh dang.

I frankly wouldnt complain that much if there wasnt so much tutorial to be done. its kinda sickening. wanting to study, but you cant cause you have to finish tutorial and assignment.

pity syg alot. he's sure going through hell lot of stress. i really hope he is doing ok.

frankly, my purpose of blogging today to just pop by and say HI.

hahax. lame i know. but i really need to catch up with my work and revision. don't want to do so badly this time.

oh yeah, syg concert was a blast, though the error is really obvious. but oh well, people do make mistake, right?

toodles.

.aishah.

2009-02-07T01:32:00.004+08:00

i hate nightmares. now i cant sleep anymore.

and its too my great wonders that i can actually allow a nightmare affect me. damn. i m like how old seh. 19 in like one month? grow up aishah!

its time for me to start on what i want to do. i been procrastinating too much. time to stop. time to do well academically. no more lingering any more. i have to do well this semester.

problems after problems piles eventhough i am out. i turn my back to the problems. i pretend it did not exist. i tried ignoring, thinking someone will come and take it away from me. i m so really deluded. c'mon aishah. be brave. take up this challenge.

its thanks to valerie that i m brave enough to take up those challenge. seriously, im a coward. no doubt. i will try to weaver my escape from this problems. valerie made me realise that i have done wrong in doing that. nobody knows really the troubled heart that i felt. she was the only one to have guessed why i did not come for class the whole week. she was the one who waken me up from the deluded dreams that i had. and really, i m greatly to have a friend like her.

cam-whoring session with my 2 closest classmates: zhi li and val.

ooh. to darling noori.. HAPPY 19th BELATED BIRTHDAY! may all your dream and wishes come true. stay happy. and sorry for the late wish. hehex

so now i m planning the back to school party for OOPS! hahax. i guess me and events can never separate. well. will set this event a challenge. targeting 2500 students. hmm. oh well. i can do this. that is for sure.

first meeting at paragon starbuck. kena arrowed by hafiidz. sheesh. so back to administrative again. but then again, i have no regret for it. so, might as well do it right.

fine. i know i m talking crap now. too tired already. thought i update something off on this week. hehex. oh well. sleep time.

to kesha, syg and enoki (syg's band) : all the best for your concert!.

.aishah.

2009-02-04T09:41:00.003+08:00

syg..

this is for you.

My life suck without you
Kelly Clarkson

Love you lots.

.aishah.

2009-01-29T21:14:00.003+08:00

it feels like that certain someone is avoiding me. did i do something wrong that i deserve this treatment? seriously, if i did something wrong, can you just tell me what went wrong? rather than making me feel like a dumbass here wondering where i go wrong and all..

sheesh.

well. here i m outside guitar club room. listening to syg band jam while i try to finish all my long due tutorial. seriously, don't it get any worst? hate the drawing now.

oh hell with it.

i cant seem to even be bothered with ADD. i m too tired and feeling fucked up. until one person have the conscience to come up and ask me what went wrong, till then i wont help much. instead order around. since that person says i did not do much. now i give them a feel on what its like when im not doing much.

a**hole.

dont even know what i m ranting about.

have not finished my tutorial - shit
have not done my presentation - double shit
have not start collecting money for ADD - triple shit
have not start studying for exam - super shit
have not save up enough money for valentine - extremely shit.

oh yeah.
that is my life..

oh what the hell.
back to facebook.

warning to all those who want to start facebook: FACEBOOK IS DARN ADDICTIVE!

p.s: darling, i miss you. its been sometime since we met each other eh? eventhough we are like in the same school and all. its weird we dont bump to each other so that often. hahax.

.aishah.

2009-01-27T00:02:00.000+08:00

enjoy!

Monster
by meg and dia

His little whispers
“Love me, love me”
That's all I ask for
Love me, love me
He battered his tiny fists to feel something
Wondered what it's like to touch and feel something

Monster
How should I feel?
Creatures lie here
Looking through the window

That night he caged her
Bruised and broke her
He struggled closer
Then he stole her
Violet wrists and then her ankles
Silent Pain
Then he slowly saw their nightmares were his dreams

Monster
How should I feel?
Creatures lie here
Looking through the windows

I will
Hear their voices
I'm a glass child
I am Hannah's regrets

Monster
How should I feel?
Turn the sheets down
Murder ears with pillow lace
There's bath tubs
Full of glow flies
Bathe in kerosene
Their words tattooed in his veins

Yeah

2009-01-26T23:32:00.002+08:00

i m so proud of myself for getting 3/4 of my tutorial during this 3 days.

hip hip hooray for me.
lol.

ok. really. i m proud of myself. i mean, sure, i procrastinate to much. make new friends and such. but still, at the end of the day, i managed to get the things done. hehex. down with FCII group tutorial. i just need to draw all the construction, which i can do on wednesday night. then i can start thinking for the gems presentation already of which, i m like half way done also. just need to do PM and i m free like a bird. this means that i can go for the TIMBER party on saturday. any takers?

hehex.

syg is out there enjoying his chinese new year celebration. i hope he had fun. who knows maybe he collect enough ang pao, then can treat me or something. lol.

i better stop fantasizing.

i was facebook-ing early in the morning. seriously, facebook took over my life now. it used to be friendstar. but now facebook is like, wow. hahax. so i was updating some things and such. and i met a new friend. ok. did not meet up or anything, seeing that im like stuck the whole day at home. nope. i meant to say that i chatted with him. this guy by the name of moses. chatted with him through facebook. oh you know the chat log at facebook itself. apparently he is from Nigeria. kinda nice.

its nice having a pen pal for a change.

oh well. i better finished up with my gems. after which, i can enjoyed the whole day at city hall with syg tmr. hehex.

.aishah.

2009-01-25T21:57:00.013+08:00

i knew that there are some people out there who are out to kill me for not updating my blog so frequently eventhough my laptop is like back to normal. hehex. begging for mercy. i have running like a dog eversince the next year start, trying to finish all my tutorial, settling my ADD matters.

its a miserable life if you want to know.

so yeah. now i m counting down to all my tutorials. sheesh.

believe it or not, i actually felt so depressed and excited that my little brother have started his school. seriously, when i see him board the van, my eyes was watery and all. sheesh. it feels like he have grown up too fast. i still like playing around with him and all. gosh. ok, i sound like a mom.

weird.

but he look so darn cute. really really.

oh well. kids grow. i just hope he do better than me in life.

snap out of it aishah.

went over to terence house to have dinner together with the TA-DA. only person missing: phoebe. i wonder where she is. i don't know whether she read this but i will still take the chance: I MISS YOU PHOEBE!

had fun and all still. a pity i wasnt cam-whoring with them. its been month since i saw them. talk to jon like non-stop. from one story to another. if phoe were to be there, it will be more hype. i mean, with her crazy thoughts and their constant teasing on me, we will be laughing like hyenas. hahax.

girl, where are you?

luckily terence stayed the same block as me. kinda easy to go home. just had to walk kesha to the bus stop. i really hope i will get to study in the same university with her and phoe. that will be so totally awesome.

had nice dinner and all. pizza and whatever the food that Chinese family eat during Chinese New Year eve. really, i never get to enjoyed those privileges. thanks to my dearest friend, i get to taste what its like to celebrate other cultures. thanks guys. love you all.

worrying thoughts has just clouded my head.

been spending more time with syg at city hall. i am opening up more to syg. its a nice feeling being able to talk to someone your thoughts and all. so lucky to have him by my side. i guess i get edgy and jealous really easily. and he is like so freaking patience with me eventhough i have step his limit most of the time.

"syg. sorry may seem to be easily coming out of my mouth this few days. but really, everytime i said it, i meant it from the bottom of my heart. i want to be a better person for you. someone whom you can be proud of. give me a chance to do that. i need a little bit more of your patience so that i can understand what my life really mean. you mean everything to me. love you so much

so yeah. modules are getting much more pain in the HEAD! ha. its so difficult to understand. even for law. i mean, i usually m proud of myself for understanding the basic concept after reading once. but now, i need to read at least 2 time before i get to understand the real meaning of Agency. you know law. they may say one thing, but there is always an exception.

fc is getting much more technical with all the drawings. all the joints and such. sheesh. half the time during lecture, i fell asleep as i don't understand a bloody thing the lecturer is lecturing about. all i know, i have to copy the diagram that he had simplified for us on the board.

pm is ok. i mean, planning to shutting down event is practically what i have been doing the whole 2 years in poly. just all the diagrams need more time to understand. let say resource allocation. do you know you can make it into histogram? and with careful planning, you can ensure that your manpower are not too much and not too little? seriously, i didnt know this can happen. it may sound easy, but really, its not. it took me one bloody hour just to complete allocating the resources.

well. at least add is running slightly smoothly for now. thank gawd for that.

i dont know if people are that dumb to realise that i have quit the club. oh well. they will know someday. then again, why should i care people know that i quit, right?

because you dont want them to keep asking you for help for their stuff, dumbass.

ok. i m freaking people out as i m answering my own question

oh hell with it.

time to finish my report again. another report. shucks. i really hope my hard work paid off and my friends had fun celebrating Chinese new year. seriously, i don't know who in the right mind ask their friends to give them all their works so that they can have fun celebrating. its no wonder people call me workaholic. oh well.

i'm lost without you

.aishah.

2009-01-11T19:54:00.004+08:00

ok. i m bored. total boredom is killing me now.
gosh

i just dont comprehend myself. why when i m bored, i cant study. but when i m full with stuffs to do, im itching to study? sheesh. i m becoming weirder every moment.

hahax.

ok. im bored. i still have my report to settle. my long overdue tutorial. my write up. my research. gosh. now i wish i had went to jc to study instead of poly. at the very least now i wont be studying. i will be working somewhere since Alevel are long over. envy those friends of mine who took Alevel. should have listen to my dad to go jc.

then again. i wont be meeting fabulous people. oh well. there is always a loss in every decision you make.

what the hell m i ranting about?

will have to start studying already since my exam is like in 4 weeks time. 4 WEEKS!!. time sure flies when you are enjoying. hahax.

oh. tender my resignation. i know. its so not aishah to tender resignation when school is almost coming to an end. but believe me, its not without heavy consideration. i weigh the pros and cons carefully. i mean, like duh i regret tendering it. but i guess its for my own benefits. to survive i need to forgo something.

i spend a year building it for my club. my credibility. my usefulness and all. just a waste that its all going down the drain. but it time i make a decision, a right one, that wil benefit me. its not as if the club will collapse if i stop helping them.

i mean, i m still handling ADD. so no big deal right? if the president cant bloody hell handle some stuffs, then i will just say - Fuck! cant you like handle it yourself? didnt you say the year 1 are so great? get them to do then. i have done my work already.

yep. that is not me. i know. but i do wish that one of this days i get to tell tha straight to his face. i mean, didnt he realise that we are slowly avoiding the club? oh fuck it.

miss syg. miss darling. and i miss hanging out with TA-DA! really miss them disturbing me.

just a bit more and i will be able to attain nirvana.

lol.

till next time.

the devil in me is out

.aishah.

2009-01-10T14:15:00.002+08:00

i guess i have made up my mind.
i sure hope i dont regret it.

its at time like this, when you are damn sick you will find yourself who are really your love one and your true friends. ok. lets be fair. those whom i have not seen for quite some time is not included, for the very fact that i have not seen them for so long. sheesh. what i means is people who are studying under the same roof as me. who constantly see me. that kind of friends? ok. school mates i guess.

i got valerie who call me asking me not to worry and all. she kept her word of making my worries for school subside. lets see. i was darn worried about ADD. she help me talk to the advisor on not scolding the committee. she help me handle my tutorial and practical. she talk sense to my class mates. thx lots val!

syg made the effort of coming over my house on thursday. hehex. too weak to move around so yeah he made the effort to visit me. how touching. hehex. my day was much brighter because of him coming. love you syg!

alright. i guess i have to admit there are few of those who really cared for me. even my advisor was damn worried for me. my ADVISOR. sheesh.

i know i was at the wrong for the lashing out and all. but despite that, i still find people supporting me. people like gideon, nabeel, zhi li and such. i cant believed i have such a friend like them. have to say, this friends are really hard to come by.

there are also messages send by darling and noori. so shweet. love you gurls.

hahax.

i feel like this post is my dying post. lol.

ok. its not.

but really i feel grateful to those who were worried sick of me.
worried + understanding + helpful = great friends
its nice to know i have such great friend like them.

and i miss the grand opening of SP open house. darn. was looking forward to it lah. hate it when i fall sick. but looking at the brighter note, at least i know who are truly my friends.

love you all.

at time like this i know what are the malice in you

.aishah.

2009-01-09T08:58:00.001+08:00

i miss school..

i miss everyone..

i miss everything..

now i hate being sick..

.aishah.

2009-01-08T09:57:00.002+08:00

i dun understand.. why is it any matters that have got to do with clubs always fall back to me?
why me? why not the president? why the secretary? my job is just to take down minutes, do up the club documents.. not to take up all this shit..

i m so close to just bursting out and tell gideon that i had enough. i don't want anymore nonsense. i want my life back. one more problem and i will just resign my post.

fuck to all those who cant even take a little remark. i wasnt even scolding you guys. i just raise my voice and there you are angry like nobody business. you said i never used my money to pay the poster. erm.. excuse me, i just spend like a few hundreds trying to solve the bloody case that you brought upon. so now this is what i get..

want to know why i did not tell you my problems? that is because i doubt any of you will understand. you say let it out by telling you guys what problems i faced. excuse me, i realise something. the more i told you all, the more problem you have to fret about then you cant even attend your problem. just like when the bloody fucking entertainment company asked you for cancellation fee. i told you i will handle them. then you drop it altogether? without even bothering the outcome? is that the kind of attitude to be event coordinator.

maybe you were just in the midst of your anger as i just lash out just like that. but please lah, you need not need to lash it out in your blog and make it sound like i was the horrible bitch. seriously, you have not seen the worst of me.

and to that one person who think i gave you cold shudder? well, just want to inform you, if i were to stick around and talk again, i will definitely burst out. i m already at the peak of just lashing out anybody who just angered me even for a little.

enough if you cant even handle a snide remark and goes bursting all over. frankly, you are not cut out for the world then. more scolding you will be faced. more worst. and there you proudly claim that you are an event student? omfg. i think you are just a disgrace to our batch.

sad but true.

i m done with the attitude they gave me. you pass to me late and there you said i was rushing you guys? erm.. but dont you think you are ust procastinating too much?

WAKE UP! there is no more time for you to still joke around. you dont have time already. don't you ever realise that.

of course you can say i did not contribute much. oh fuck yes. i did not contribute. fuck. then who the hell got the most scolding? get your facts right before i start screaming at you.

i have come to a point that i feel so disgusted by you guys that i have no more faith already. sorry. i know people kept telling me, patience. they can do it. but after this incident, i think the faith is going downhill. buckle up now if you dont want drastic thing to happen.

prove me wrong now if you think i talk rubbish 'coz i dont think i m.

screw it all. because of you guys, i fought with the person i love the most. i was drenched in tears the whole night. feeling guilty and all for scolding you guys.. ok not scolding. snide remark. you told us to be in your shoes.. oh well. why not we exchange? i dont mind for the love of god!

fuck it man..

and i m damn piss at myself for lashing out at the innocent person. damn fucking stupid. urgh.

syg. i love you no matter what happen. do forgive me for what happen yesterday. dont know what went into my head also.

.aishah.

2009-01-03T18:11:00.007+08:00

i was actually planning to have a damn nice time for this new year. i mean.. a new year since fabulous things are coming up.. yep.. totally spoilt with arguments after arguments with parents. yada..

the whole fiasco.

anyway.. new year. went to ecp with syg. oh yeah. the plan of wanting to suntan failed miserably thanks to the oh-so-ever-changing weather. sheesh. cycled for like one hour and my butt hurt already. gosh.

so the 2 of us did the most unimaginable thing ever. we sat near the beach and......... we talk.. yep. so interesting eh?

hahax.

i know. its like totally lame. but what else can we do. my butt hurt nobody business. no sun to get tan. sea too pack with the M&M. so yeah we just enjoyed the wind and enjoying the presence of our company.

we talked. future behold ahead us. the oh-so-frequent argument we had. gosh.

its like everything moved so far. it feels like only yesterday that we knew each other. now, its like 8 month with each other. see how time fly so fast.

well, friday nothing much happen. day was spoilt since class changed back from 3 to 5 pm to cover our holiday lecture. no fun. so yeah. whats more, after i finished class, both of us had meetings. darn meetings. he have to leave much earlier as he was meeting up with his friends for a small gathering. guys night out. understand understood. so yeah. nothing interesting happen.

except that i felt weird this whole week. people look at me from head to toe. erm, is my clothes to eccentric? i thought it was just ok? oh well.

well, i do had fun hitting syg on his hand, playing scissors,paper or stone.

childish, i know.

oh what to do. a growing teenagers need to be childish to learn how to grow up, right?

aishah, stop ranting.

ok ok.. i will..

hahax.

better get back to my assignment.

ps. jon, felt bad not going out with you today. i promise, we will definitely go out, after this whole fiasco is over.

loved and contented with my beloved.

.aishah.

2008-12-31T19:06:00.004+08:00

i m feeling so darn upset with myself. breaking a promise that i made with syg.. it feels like shit. total shit. i mean, i always felt that way everytime i had to break a promise. but somehow or somewhat, this feel worse.

really, i cant stand hearing syg voice changed from being estatic to being dissapointed as i cant join him for the marina countdown.. the whole day i was looking forward to it. little did i expect my mom to choose to put me into a predicament of having me to make my own choice - to go or not to go.

frankly, the devil me will just say "GO! its your first new year that you will be celebrating with your darling". however the angel me have to say "Remember your mom. she will be worried sick of you. She is not ready to let you venture out to the scary world on my own. she is doing this for your sake." Damn.

it is never fair, life i mean. well realise that so long ago. sheesh.

of all the time. i was really looking forward to counting down with syg for the first time in my life. sad to say, for the past 18 years, never did i get to countdown with my friends. as always, i have been stuck at home. and here i thought i could change something about it.

maybe i could. just go i mean. but that will mean dissappointing my mom. so now what? if i dont hurt syg, i hurt my mom?

i hate it when people put me into this kind of predicament. making me choose the most difficult choice eventhough i had actually made my own choice. its like i have planned the whole thing, so eager about going, telling myself that no matter what happen, i would not change my mind. then with ease, a sudden change that caught me offguard made me look at the whole thing at a different perspective. then i will start hurting at least one person. damnation.

now i understand why people hate so much to make decision that they just go with the flow. understand understood.

really. even if i start ranting all my anger here on the blog, it wont be of use also. sheesh.

why in the world did i have a blog in the first place also?
oh. to just follow the crowd.

Figures.

oh well. at least i got my ecp trip tomorrow to look forward to. if that also my mom have to put me in a predicament, then i wont know what to say.

syg. i really love you no matter what happen.
love you truly, madly, deeply.

.aishah.

2008-12-28T17:13:00.010+08:00

back from e appreaciation dinner n family gathering at ecp. hahax..

e appreciation dinner was ay-ok onli. nuthing too special.. well. wat can i say.. i guess its just too formal n there r like too many monkeys in e hotel for it to be formal. hahax. pple r shouting, cheering n jeering in e ballroom itself.. gosh..

i noe very well tt BE add will be much better than tt.. i shud tink so esp with e help of e few favourite girlfriend - ama n shiffa. i shud tink they will be able to foresee things tt i cant foresee

myself

aniwae.. syg pick me frm. ok. fine.. he nd to use my dad's car so he had to come over my hse. my family r so use to his presence tt they haf treated him as a family. e funny ting was tt he afraid to call my dad to ask for e car.. hehex.. freaking adorable..

well.. he came at abt 5pm.. supposedly to b at 4pm.. shud b expecting him to come late.. gosh.. well.. gave me ample of time to get ready.. went to the hairdresser near my house to set my hair.. n really.. i love e hairstyle.. i mean apart from the hardness of it, it look so freaking nice.. n really i wasnt expecting tt nice ah.. hahax..

mom bought for me this awesome yet simple dress at causeway pt.. so put together with my mom makeup skill of nude colour scheme n my oh-damn-freaking-nice-hairstyle, i haf to say, i look awesome.. putting e image together with a few accesories n a new black heel shoes, i hate to admit tis bt i feel damn sexy lah.. hehex..

i mean.. even my oh-so-sarcastic sister said i look awesome.. how can i not feel good of my dress up. i noe for sure tt i manage to attract syg attention..yep.. he look damn stun wen he saw me. hehex. my task haf been fulfilled. hahax.

syg look dashing himself.. well.. like of course.. but noe wat made my day then? syg really couldnt take off his eyes frm me n he nvr even look at other hotter chicks.. tt alone is enough to make my day..

well then.. syg drove my dad car to jurong to pick ama up.. e rest of e bec pple were there alrdy at e hotel.. really dunno y they come so early lah.. well, traffic was slow n we got lost trying to reach to jurong.. hahax.. we might b studyin at e west but we are still noobs in trying to figure out how to reach one place to another.. hahax..

conrad hotel was awesome by itself.. service was great. food was too little.. sheesh.. but filling for me.. took some pics with e pple.. nt too many though.. a pity i did not took pic with syg..

e dudette

e dude

girls look hot.. guys look dashing.. gosh..

well. went back to sch aft sending ama to jurong.. went to kellyn party.. kinda fun.. except tt i was in clothes tt is not really suitable for this event lah.. so yeah.. did not really dance then.. oh well.

nuthing happen after tt.. sing-songs... talk all night.. jokes.. it mayb simple.. but still memorable..

well.. slpt like at 7.. woke up at like 10.. disturb syg frm slping hehex.. how evil can i b right? hahax.. oh well..

and at freakin last. i noe hw to go back w/o getting lost.. hahax.. i mean.. wen i said i m noob wen it comes to e road in e west.. i really am.. i dun even noe how to go back if i were to drive myself.. tt is bad.. i noe. hahax. but well.. yst i managed to do it.. hahax..

wen back hm.. syg hang arnd at hm.. since my family goin to ecp n its like quite near to his hse.. he even promised to come down for my family picnic ah..

well.. talkin abt picnic.. really i tink its more like having a party at e void deck.. food was damn alot. we had various drinks.. foods.. pizza.. gosh.. cam-whoring in session of course.. wats more with e beautiful view there..

my sis n cuzz

my cute lil bro

my cuzz

e beauuuutiful scenery

syg came abt 9plus.. talk till his frens came.. ok.. fine.. i admit.. i fell asleep.. wat do u expect wen u slpt like only a few hours.. his frens came abt 2.30am.. ate some of the many food we had then they left to slack somewhere near syg hse..

e onli ting i regret is not renting a bike n swimmin in e sea.. gosh.. i was so darn prepared to do tt lah.. bt apparently my sis did not want to do them.. so yeah.. there i was.. left to cam-whore.. n talk to myself.. ok.. its not tt bad.. since i had to take care of my cute n so adorable brother, nieces n nephews.. hahax..

oh well.. sch is startin tmr.. n i haf not even started with my assignment.. oh freakin shit.. ok.. back to work now...

oh yeah..

to e t.a.d.a gang.. we shud like hang out.. tis coming weekend maybe if everyone is free.. it has been sometime since we last went out..

its because of u tt i m who i m

.aishah.

2008-12-24T10:37:00.002+08:00

went shopping with my dearest syg yst. well, last min shopping for our appreciation dinner which is held on like this fri? spend e whole 10 hours getting tis few stuff: shirt, vest, pants & bag. gosh.

oh well.. i dun mind going out with him especially since there is doughnut, fries and coke. dortz.
he is going to kil me for this. hehex.

n really, yst was e only time i really get to enjoy myself.. well, apart from e matches i haf been playing with my old team mates.

i still remembered e first time when i first met him.. gosh was bold to just go up to him n talk to him..

i remembered all e first time we did. e first time we held hand. e first time we hug. e first time we kiss. e first time we fought. lol.

syg haf always create an impact to me. i guess he is e greatest gift i haf ever received throughtout my whole 18 years of life.

well, enough of e reminiscence.

so yeah.. now i m like tinkin of wat kind of hairstyle is suitable for my appreciation dinner this fri. 25bucks gone flying like tt coz i need to style my hair.. then i nd to gt e necessary accesories. like netted gloves.. choker.. glitter. ribbons.. i gt like tis whole image look in my head. dunno y i love e look so much.. hehex..

nuthing much to say of my dress.. it has alwys been e plain kind. i guess my accessories help me. i realize all tis while, my dresses for the past dinner haf always been plain.. as in, its not too eye-opening. not too revealing.. not too sexy. just simple ordinary dresses where i can literary use for other days. might even wear it to sch.. lol.

darling nures.. sorry to haf made u concern abt me.. dun worry so much ay.. i just noe hw to handle tis.

at time.. i just shoot wateva i m tinking.. n nvr really tink back wat i was talkin abt.. onli wen its too late did i realise my mistake. dang.. haf to control tis big mouth of mine.. haf been getting into trouble thx to tis mouth of mind. sheesh..

i guess my post is quite random today.. oh well.. i feel like being random then again.. so wateve..
n hell yeah.. m i going to enjoy tis last few days of holidays before sch resume again. darn sch man..

And I said Romeo,
take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting,
all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story,
baby, just say yes

.aishah.

2008-12-21T14:17:00.004+08:00

oh dang.. i realise its close to one mth since i last update my blog.. sorry sorry..

holiday. yep. the festive season is here. which means SALES! dortz.

ok. nvm. just ignore the totally random fact that i just posted. i have nvr feel so stress up with club stuff before. even last year, when i had no body to help me on my task - learning all the stuff by myself. so why do i feel darn stress like now?

oh yeah. i noe why. thx to my oh-so-cant-be-bothered-president and the remaining half of the MCs, who left me alone together with shiffa n nabeel to slack of the work. smart ass.

i doubt anybody noes what i m really feeling right now. put on a disappearing act. go ahead. i will just clear up the bloody mess u haf put. y not u just dump all the shits to me n i will just settle them for u? wldn't tt be much better. at least u no nd to waste much of my precious time? wldn't tt be good?

then let me get all the blame. oh.. no problem. i can solve every bloody problem tt u guys dump on me.. its better tt way pulling up a disappearing act, leaving me to solve all the fucking shits tt u left behind.. smart MCs..

even e room. gosh. tt also u cant even clean? ended up a student from dmit n sb themselves help me clean. don't u ever felt embarrased by it?

sheesh.

the rant has not end yet...

my president.. seriously.. u will be e best president tt i haf ever known provided u just keep to ur words.. even e stuff tt nd to b settle i haf to settle for u.. wat the fuck with tt attitude? pple r calling me coz they cant get thru u.. so wat now? i m e new president? worst still, u wun even get frantic abt tis issue.. onli at the last minute will u realise the severeness of e prob..

well, it will be ok, if i dun get into e trouble. now my name is so severely blacklisted coz i haf been covering the fucking shits tt u n e others n left..

my gawd. holiday was planned to be the time i spend with syg.. my add.. my sec frends.. my close buddies.. but wat do i get ended up? more worries for e club...

u claimed tt i haf intefered too much to ur post.. then wen i totally let u be on ur own, u nvr even do ur stuff? wow.. just wow... u still came back asking more helps from me...

fuckin assholic.

i hate it. 2 wks of hols burn just for club.. each night i cried thinkin of all e probs.. did u even bother? nope.. u ask.. "are u ok?" like as if it will help much..

u share all ur problems to e ex-president. n u take in every solution he gave u.. for gawd sake. he is a graduate. GRADUATE. u shud b handling e prob n searchin for solution. y must u depend on him for help. wat e help are we fucking MCs here for?

u just shoot when u realise things haf went wrong. u nvr really cared wat others think. thx. i was one of the victim. u claim we nvr do work. u told others we nvr help u. r u really telin e truth? frankly, i tink its more like u r not helping urself to be independent.

u just wan tings to go nice n smooth. but u were nvr there to support.. that wasnt the president we were looking for. c'mon, u werent there to advise or something. u just said - "i want the event to be a good event. a memorable one for everyone to enjoy".. u r bothered by the masses bt nvr the person running for u..

u care for the sub-comm. bt haf u cared for our feeling? e one hu spend countless hours helping u run e club? did u even thx us? to u, e masses r right, n we r wrong.. want to noe something? i m fucking tired of this all..

i tink syg wld haf been bored with me complaining abt e stuff i haf to do. everynight there will always b new tings to talk abt, just on club.

my patience limit is runnin darn low now. its now or never. its time for me to b selfish.. i wan time for myself n not time running e club. i noe its cowardly of me to just quit at e last min. but yep. i m so going to do tt. enough is enough. now u run e show without my help. i should tink u haf more than enough help by now. go n complain to everyone u noe tt i totally quit e whole ting n nobody is helping u.. frankly, i cant b bothered oso.

oh.. dun worry.. add is my baby.. i will not let anyone else to take over my precious.. i spend mths on it.. m so not going to let it go. dun worry.. i will finish it with a bang.. but not for the club sake.. but for e advisor sake hu had actually help me alot during e plannin stage.. i make a promise.. n i m not going to break tt promise because of u..

fuck.. wat e hell m i ranting.. sheesh..

well, just an advise:Read tis post onli when u r bored.. n i really mean darn bored..

ooh..

n i love darlings n syg for listening to me thru my up n down.

xoxoxo
aishah

2008-12-06T16:24:00.002+08:00

i m really nuts.. i cant believe i just ordered something online..
that is so totally not me..

hahax..

i hope the dress will be something that syg will say it look nice on me..
hehex..

at least.. i dont waste time going shopping.. now i can online shop..
okie.. not making sense..

to the season with joyous..

test down..
exam to go..

prozac.. yep.. i need it..

.aishah.

2008-11-25T04:58:00.000+08:00

i m just darn sleepy now..

I WANT MY BED!

.aishah.

2008-11-19T17:19:00.003+08:00

so here i m.. at fc4.. next to me, syg teasing and disturbing me. sheesh.

cant wait for tuesday steamboat with ronald, phoebe and fadly. hehex. gosh. ron is like leaving for ns in like less than a month. better hang out with him more often before he leave for ns. so gonna miss his preaching over christianity and science. lol..

okie. so really i dunno what to blog about. i just m here so that it entertain those darlings of mine who have been pestering me to update my blog..

hmm. assignment. presentation. upcoming test. boring lectures. frustrating meeting. yep. practically the same everyweek. ooh. one good thing is that, no noisy siblings at home. well, its home its not really quiet without them. it will be me talking the most. and my dad will be singing some oldies song for gawd-knows who. sheesh

okie.. better return back syg his laptop so that he can chat easily with his friends..

hehex.

.aishah.

2008-11-16T02:36:00.010+08:00

alright..

its like 2.40am now, and i m still wide awake. golly..

here i thought chicken make me sleepy. well, apparently it did not. i ate like 2 chicken wings at 12mn with no after effect. cheat my feeling seh.

lol.

have been having mood swing lately. i cried alot. i got mad easily. i m irritated like always. and i have no mood to do anything except be in my own fairy tale land. darn. all this while i have been telling syg that its just my pms. sheesh.

hate pms.

been having frequent argument with syg, but that is with making up at the end of the day. i m just overly paranoid. urgh. get this pms-mood-swing away from me. i don't wanna hurt syg anymore. over the slightest thing can be such a huge argument for the both of us. get it over. LIKE NOW!!

right. been going out really frequently with syg. i mean on top of like meeting him after school, i literally had lunch with him, met him before his class, went over to his school and waited for him and even went out on the weekends. don't seem to get enough of each other. sheesh. well, at the very least i get to avoid the one and only place i would love to avoid for the time being. well, fc6 food is about the same as fc1. so no complaints there.

i should be committed for being so committed.

hahax.

on top of my oh-so-haywiring-emotional that has not been kept in place, i went for a series of event lately. okie. talentime. congratulation to zara for winning the be-sd talentime. oh my gosh. her voice is like heavenly. to jd. congrats on coming second. no surprises there actually. hehex.

syg perform too on that day. for lezlie and ubai band. i really felt bad for introducing him to the bec family.he is like nowhere to be found in dmit club since he is always in bec. hmm.

went to bugis, amk and city hall so often now that i got sick of this places. you see, me and syg always say we go home early. well, we did left the school earlier than usual, but we never did went home early. always ended up somewhere studying. gosh. queensway. bugis. amk. city hall. harbour front. tampines. its no wonder i m getting even broke now. feel the pinch in my pocket.

went to terence workplace (forgotten which hotel) to celebrate his birthday. oh you know, the one next to marina square? what in the freaking world is that hotel called? sheesh. oh. anyway. yeah. we ate there.. and oh my gawd. the chocolate fondue (especially) and the buffet were superbly nice lah. wish syg was there to join. but yeah was it nice.

to terence- i know it come in tiny winny bit late, but still i will like to wish you HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! love you and the ta-da alot. i mean as friend and not romantically.

lol.

lots of laughter that night especially since we have rekindle our friendship back. wish kesha was there to join. only then will it be completed.

the gang i mean.

well, appreciation dinner will be on 26dec 08. the theme will be hollywood. guess who i will come in? oh c'mon, you know who. hahax. if your guess is vanessa hudgens, then your guess is right. hahax. i mean,its so easy to dress up like her. all i need to do is spend my money on styling my hair and clothes. its not that hard, right?

i m plain retarded, don't you think?. lol

okie. i even went to the free quality event, soft toy bear exhibition at art house. and oh my gawd. its so freaking nice and cute lah. i did not get much photos as it was really crowded.

met a few of my classmates like xavier, eugene and kat. even met shu min, jin fang and yun ting there. gosh. depm students really went all the way to know what type of events are available in singapore.

love depm.

lol.

well, me and syg went to see all the cute teddy bears then went to the bridge near fullerton hotel(forgotten the bloody name) for our camwhoring time

i guess that its for now. the weather is really nice to sleep. cuddling in my blanket in the cold weather. on my soft warm bed which is waiting for me. hahax.

to the bed i go. lol.

i'm looking at you, and my heart loves the view.
cause you mean everything..

.aishah.

2008-11-14T13:02:00.002+08:00

gosh. people been complaining for not updating my blog. okie. its not my fault kay.. i m just plain busy and tired to even talk about how the days have been going.. sheesh.

hehex

year 2 2nd semester have been lots more demanding. i guess thanks to the demanding lecturers i have gotten so far. i have yet to skip any of my tutorial classes. too afraid deduction in marks. you see. all my tutorial have been send on time. i just hope i can maintain my results as it is ah.

add as really been a worrying thing. gosh. on top of all those question shoot by the year 3s, lecturers have occasionally been calling me regarding it. its such a stressful thing that at one point of my time, i feel like just giving it up. thank gawd jerelyn is there hearing me out. if not for here, i will be too stress out to even think and gawd knows what else i will do.

dissapointment in them definitely. whatever some of the year 2s said about them, they are not showing it in add. so what now? it is not important. they need people to constantly tell them what to do. the initiative is so not there. don't scold me for being pessismistic. they just don't show their own quality. everything need to be shove at them before they take up the role. don't tell me they going to bring this up when they are in their working life? 'cause honestly, i will no doubt say that they will not succeed.

i mean, isnt it true that to be success, you have to be initiative. you should know what to do. not depend on others to tell you what you are suppose to do. well, unless you have an instruction saying that you are suppose to follow blindly to whatever the manager ask you to do and not do thing to your own accord. i doubt that will happen.

gosh. its been so long since i get to really rant here. i mean, on my old blog website, i have to watch out what i rant about, fearing someone will get hurt. luckily i thought of changing the site..

okie..

enough ranting. going to watch hsm3 yet again online. hehex..

other time i will talk about what happen recently. too many thing to talk about. gosh

.aishah.

2008-11-09T11:19:00.002+08:00

yep.. its time for a new blog.. too many people reading all my ranting. getting slightly uncomfortable letting them read all those stuffs.

anyway. those who want to read this will have to personally ask for my blog website so that it will be even difficult for people to read.

arguments after arguments with syg. i feel so bad. maybe its just that i m over hyperly sensitive. or just maybe i m plain selfish. i really dunno what i will do without syg by me.

test is coming and i m really gearing up for it.. i want to score well this time. dun want to be unprepared like my previous semestral test. shucks.

club has been going haywire.. but this time i m going to let it be and see what our dear president will do. without me and shiffa help. let us see what he is capable of doing.. if he managed to settle this, then i will have to salute him. but apparently, from what i see, he is not doing anything and hoping things will settled by themselves. i hope he realize this before is too late..

going for the teddy bear exhibition with my beloved syg later.. hehex.. can't wait..

alrighty then. till next entry.. toodle-oo..

.aishah.